I have watched my eighteen year old son struggling with a situation for the better part of 2 years. Watched is not the appropriate word to describe everything he and I have attempted in the hope that he would see improvement…even just a hint of improvement.
Doctors, counselors, chiropractors, acupuncturists, Reiki-the list is endless. There are also the vitamins and supplements that fill a shelf in the closet and a clear tote sitting on the counter.
I won’t even begin to describe the eating plans he has tried. After eating nothing but bone broth and sauerkraut for 2 weeks, he settled on a dairy-free, sugar-free and gluten-free diet. As I have watched his dedication and self-discipline over the past year, I can’t help but think I’d be up foraging for chocolate every night.
Not my son. He is an amazing young man who cares and feels with all his being. He will stop at nothing to feel better despite no answers or improvement.
Five months ago, I came across this quote:
You have been assigned this mountain to show others that it can be moved
It stopped me dead in my tracks. At that moment, I realized that this was his mountain to move. Not mine. I had done everything I could to help and he was beginning to get frustrated with me asking how he was feeling, or if he had taken all his vitamins today.
As mothers, we want to hold our son’s hand and fix what is broken. I made a decision that day to let him come to me when he had questions or wanted my help. The tension has dissipated and he is doing what needs to be done.
I made a small plaque with this quote on it and gave it to him for Christmas. It sits next to his bed, where he placed it. Sometimes I walk into his room just to read it and be reminded to trust.
This challenge is definitely a mountain but I have no doubt that he will move it. In turn, he will empathize with others facing similar struggles. I believe he will use this mountain to help others someday.
Until then, I will be close by silently monitoring for signs that he needs my help. Okay, maybe it isn’t always so silent.